Gemmie's Birthday Party

Last Saturday 24th June, Gemmie had her birthday party at my place. I guess it is a nice place to hold events. Of course being the last Saturday of the school holidays, all the chairs and tables were booked by 3 parties downstairs.. luckily these friends aren't too fussy about sitting on the floor.

It was supposed to be a wine and cheese party.. but.. the cheese part was a bit sad.. there was only 1 "real" cheese.. a camembert.. the rest were the cubes of Cow head brand flavoured cheese.. alamak! but then again, how many Singaporeans really appreciate cheese?

There were about 16 people at the party and we finished 12 bottles of wine!! Crazy!

Anyways, I finally opened my only bottle of Cedar Creek Chardonnay and told Gemmie to drink it slooooowly.. at first she wondered why i stressed the word 'slowly'.. until she had a sip.. then she started telling other people who wanted a taste, the same thing.. slooooowwlly... everyone loved it and wondered where to get the bottle.. yeah right! there's a reason why it took me 2 years to finally open the bottle! that's because YOU CAN'T BUY IT IN SINGAPORE!! you can't even buy it in the bottle shops in Australia.. it's a boutique wine that can only be purchased straight from the winery/vineyard in the gold coast hinterland of mt tambourine.. so sad.. no more Cedar Creek wine for me... Gemmie better consider herself lucky I gave her the honour to have a taste..hahha

There were 4 distinct groups of people at the party. one was clarice's gang inc me.. next was the 4 girls who came early to help make the finger food, another was these 2 americans who got invited by daphne as eye candy for gemmie and the final bunch was a group of anti-social friends of gemmie's who sat huddled in a corner gossipping about workmates.. weird.. they never even introduced themselves to me or clarice, considering it was our apartment.

as usual with Jason, let's talk about women... 2 people caught my eye, belonging to the second group of people, the ones who came early to help out.

one was doris and the other was jocelyn.. doris looks like a simple woman, guessing around 28/29 yrs old.. pleasant looking and nice to talk to.. i told her about what i do and etc etc.. the usual stuff.. and she said she was impressed with my confidence and drive to achieve my goals.. we spoke a while about dreams, goals and ambitions.. which is kinda unusual in a first time meet you setting.. if you know much about conversation structure, you'll understand..

Here it is anyway..THE FIVE LEVELS OF COMMUNICATION (Resource: Secrets to Lasting Love, by Gary Smalley & John Powell’s book, Why am I Afraid to Tell You Who I Am? (Niles, IL: Argus Communications) 1969.)

(1) CLICHES - Typical, routine, oft repeated comments, questions and answers given out of habit and with no real forethought or genuine intent. "How are you?" "Fine." "Having a good day?" "Yes."

(2) FACTS - Information/Statistics about the weather, the office, friends, the news, personal activities, etc. Requires no in depth thinking or feeling.

(3) OPINIONS - Includes concerns, expectations, and personal goals, dreams, and desires. Due to differences of opinion that naturally arise between two people, especially between men and women, this is typically the level at which we run into the "wall of conflict."

(4) FEELINGS - Having gone through the "wall of conflict" via applying the communication skills following, you both feel safe to share your deepest emotions.

(5) NEEDS - The deepest level of communication and intimacy where you feel completely safe to reveal your unique needs with each other. Truly, unless needs are known and met, a couple will remain "strangers."

So, if you realise, we were already in level 3, discussing personal goals and dreams.

Okay okay.. I admit I think a lot into stuff.. most people will tell me.. Relaxlah!! stop thinking too much.. but i think.. it's not that easy mate!

asking me to stop thinking is like asking someone else to stop breathing.. it doesn't work.

anyway, this is me.. this is why i am different from every other guy out there.. i think with my head, not with my groin.

it's very simple for me.. there's no effort needed to come to these conclusions in my head.. i know what i want in a life partner and i go for it.. i like women who communicate well and connect with me intellectually and have her own opinions in life and goals to strive for..

she asked for my business card, but i have yet to print my new ones.. so we exchanged numbers instead.. later i asked gemmie more about doris... bad news.. she's married! sigh..

gemmie asked me to go after someone else instead.. and i said, jocelyn's sweet.. gemmie told me, yup, she is, and she's single and available.. i shld try asking her out..

okay.. here's the story about jocelyn..

during the same night, jocelyn was the other woman that caught my attention.. very sweet looking gal, and after chatting with her, her personality was sweet as well..

i "bo chap" her a bit in the initial stages mostly becos i didn't think she'd be the type who would be interested in me.. there was a bit of teasing.. overall it was very casual and fun.. i think the theory about being cocky and funny really can work..

jocelyn's 30.. although she could pass off as 21/22.. really! if she put on a JC uniform, you would swear she's a teenager. anyhow.. i asked gemmie for her number as she left early and i didn't manage to get it.. i smsed gemmie.. if you think she doesn't mind, i'd love to contact jocelyn, could i have her number?.. reply..let me ask her

later.. a vcard arrived with jocelyn's number and the following sms was "just sent u jocelyn's number upon her approval of your request :-)"

hhaha.. cute..

anyways, i smsed her to ask for a coffee meet later this week, and she said okie..

now.. this is something that i've been researching a while now.. when's a good day to ask someone out, what sort of outing, what kind of cuisine, who pays, and how soon shld you call after a date.. etc etc..

i asked clarice on what day shall i choose to ask her out.. according to her.. tues, wed or thurs.. interesting.. i was thinking the same.. certainly not a fri or sat night for a first date.. too stressful.. too much expectations..

clarice said, a sunday afternoon is quite good too.. i agreed.. so i asked for a sunday 3ish coffee.. and she counter-offered a thursday night dinner.. okay.. why not? it's still considered "safe" .. thursday night..

well.. we'll see what happens... till then.. ciao.