A few months ago, I met someone.
Initially I thought to myself... hmm.. pretty girl.. but princess attitude.. didn't give her much thought after that..
over the next 2 months, i got to know her through our msn and sms conversations and found her rather interesting..
we met up 3 times casually, and again i thought nothing of it.. yes there were a lot of teasing and flirting (if u can call it that).. but a princess nevertheless.. i was kinda guessing that it could be that all the guys have been treating her like one, therefore naturally she felt comfortable acting one..
i wasn't sure why i told her what i did over the next few weeks.. i went against every concern i had about this "relationship".. distance was a big one.. i wasn't into long distance relationships.. princess attitude? potential time-bomb..
i asked if she would consider a courtship.. a process of getting to know each other better with a potential future in mind..
she was rather non-committal.. well.. it is afterall, a courtship.. we weren't going steady or in a b/g relationship.. i was fine with that..
throughout the time we spent getting to know each other, i truly enjoyed myself.. when we were physically apart due to the distance, i guess we drew closer through our quality conversations, and it is one of my major love languages.
i am certain that she also enjoyed herself while "being" with me..
at times we surprise each other so much with the similarities we share, it was a bit scary..
things started to change early this yr.. she had asked me to plan a trip overseas together..
initially i wasn't too keen on the idea.. this becos i've seen too many people breakup after their first holiday together, esp if they took the holiday after only being together for a short while.. but i slowly tot to myself, why not? i guess it might have shown up as a lack of enthusiasm, but to me, there was more than 6 months to plan, so i took my time.. anyway, this was a holiday to australia, where i've lived for 7.5 yrs.. no big deal..
late jan, she told me in an email.. "just as i had hoped, my best fren will most likely be
touring Aust with me".. yes.. quoted correctly.. and she continues.. "it's totally awesome and i'm beyond excited.. will update you on
my Aus travel"..
hmm.. and here i had thought she wanted me to go to Aus with her.. seems more like it's a holiday for her and her best fren..
well.. i wasn't a happy camper.. and i told her in a rather sarcastic manner that i was happy for her that she had found her perfect travel partner and i could save $$ and not go.
she did apologise for being insensitive about it, but i felt she was unhappy that i was sarcastic to her.. i called her to say that i was sorry too and we put the matter to rest..
oh ya.. during that convo.. she said that it could end up being 3 or 4 girls going on the trip..
then she did what i would consider the biggest "princess" decision she could ever make..
another few days later, she smsed me to tell me that they had a discussion and decided that they were going to have an all girls holiday for female bonding time.. and that i have been bumped off..
erm.. from 2.. to 3.. and 4 maybe 5, and finally 3 girls minus me.. aiks? what happened there? was i consulted at all during all this? nope..
decisions were made, and i got the short end of it..
now.. what do i do from this point forward?
firstly, let me say that, this has actually happened to me before.. she was a friend.. we made plans to go on a holiday becos she was stressed and needed a break..
and then she asked me not to go becos she was hoping this other guy would decide to go with her instead.. but the guy couldn't confirm.. but she didn't tell me what the reason was.. she was just erm-ing and ahm-ing and i had to find out from another person tt that was the real reason.. it got me pissed off enough to tell her to f-off.. yes.. i told a girl to f-off.. i dont use vulgarities often, and almost never in front of a girl, let alone
to a girl.. i refused to talk to her for almost a yr, until she initiated the friendship again a yr later.
here's a similar situation.. she already knew i wasn't happy about her initial decision and her remarks with the best fren thingo.. and here she goes doing it again.. this time in my eyes.. worse..
back to my decision making dilemma..
i could.. bitch about it somemore, and thus be a total jerk
or i could accept that she's still young and got over excited about the whole scenario and forgot that she was dealing with a fellow human being
or i could shut up and continue accepting her princess attitude
or i could just walk away from the courtship and revert to ordinary friends..
i guess you have to know something about me. i have high esteem for myself and do not accept crap from people.
i'm sure the 2nd choice would seem reasonable.. she's young etc etc..
total Bull Shit!!
youth is not an excuse for bad behaviour. bad behaviour is an outward expression of an internal character flaw. and this character flaw is big enough for me to reconsider..
and i have reconsidered.. i am now her friend, an ordinary friend. decision made 14 Feb 2007.. valentine's day.